I am so pleased I have found a profession that I love. Every day I get to go off to work hoping that I can make a difference in someone’s day (or even major life event!).
Lots of people ask me if I love the babies the best. But to be honest I love working with the parents.
I feel that my job is to help make confident, calm and relaxed parents. They in turn make calm confident amazing children 🙂
Sometimes in making a new set of parents I need to take into account the history of both the pregnancy but also the parents themselves. Someone who is highly anxious and lives a very controlled lifestyle is not all of a sudden going to thrive in baby led attachment. Nor is the relaxed go with the flow parent going to want to follow a structured sleep and settling or feeding plan. You see making calm parents helps to let everything else fall into place. The other important part is the pregnancy maybe someone had a stressful pregnancy with lots of growth scans or years of IVF. We often support these people in pregnancy with weekly checks and scans and then they have the baby and we say all should be OK! For these new parents they are used to monitoring and checking all the time so often this is needed at first to help build confidence for these new parents.
So if your a soon to be a parent and someone thrusts a book into your hand on how to make your baby sleep, feed or whatever when you want them to and you’re a Mrs go with the flow- boy is that a waste of paper! It is important to be true to yourself the day to day choices is not always as important as you think. Remember you are your babies emotional barometer. So if your freaking out your baby is worried and anxious and guess what unlikely to feed/ sleep well.
So first we have some fabulous parents to gauge our plan by then we have this little human. I want you for a moment to imagine Robbie Williams as a baby? or even Pink! They would have been hard work and quite the dramatic personalities. This is why they are so fantastic too see on stage- but spare a thought for their parents keeping them alive to adulthood. No wonder they write songs to thank them for all they have done.
This parenting gig doesn’t really have a rule book you just have to look at what is in front of you at the time and do what feels comfortable. For example if you have little miss inpatient ‘I want milk now’ then don’t change the nappy first to wake her up or hold her off to the 3 hour mark as you thought you had too- she is most certainly going to loose her mind! However if you have Mr ‘whatever I really don’t mind’ maybe you would need to make in wait so he doesn’t snack feed or change his nappy to wake him up.
The support from a Midwife is not always just to check your stitches and weigh the baby. We can help to wade through the choices, options and plans on offer and find the best one to suit your family. The Baby Manual was created to help build a strong education for new parents about ‘why’ things happen not so much’ what to do’ about everything.
This hopefully helps to give you a guide of what is normal and what options you have to manage the situation.
I love my job and I love all my fantastic parents I get to grow throughout a postnatal period and hopefully teach them how to love themselves and their babies for who they are 🙂